Alan Related Anguish

I've been on a knife edge, there were some highs, some real lows and a mawdling, dawdling middle ground which I wished would swallow me up, in the last few days. From buzzing with 'Buzz' mania to screaming every last inch of sanity from one's body it's been an emotional rollercoaster. One thing's for sure, I won't forget 2007. I enjoyed the walk going up the grassy Hobbit meets Hogwarts Milton Abbas chapel steps the calorific choccy cake and generous presents of a Doctor Who calendar, fancy home made apron, Green and Blacks chocolate, home made butterfly cushion, notets, Desperate Housewives DVD colourful Pringles socks and heat magazine from my cousins and grandparents. But I felt an increasing sense of frustration, hemmed in by horrible arguments that no one could win, henpecked by harrassed relations and searching for a bit of breathing space and serenity.

Yet I found it, listening to my John Barrowman CD last night and taking note of the unshakeable courage and steely resolve of the emotionally charged Deal or No Deal Christmas Stars I have to say I have no regrets, things haven't always gone the way I've wanted it to but it's worked out for the best. My only concerns now are that Alan gets a happier 2008 and I get the opportunity to meet up with him again and bury a few past grievances that should firmly stay in the past, looking forward to the challenges of the teaching qualification and meeting my new Creative Writing learners. I shall now leave you with something I had published on the Sky Sports site. I would love nothing more than for my words to be heeded and for a minor miracle to occur in the coming months or years. Here's to a fantastic 2008 everyone!!!

"What's up with Smudger? (Alan Smith) I was a huge fan when he was at Leeds and had the privelige of meeting him several times he's a great bloke and a real battling spirited guy on the pitch. He's either really subdued, totally lost or goes overboard with his challenges at the moment, today's game against Wigan was a case in point. This might sound controversial but I don't think football fans will ever see the decent goal scorer and all round good player that catapulted Leeds to the Champions League ever again unless pigs fly and he goes back to Leeds. In short, he's lost that spark that made him an entertaining, likeable character he just needs someone (I'm volunteering) to kick him up the backside and cart him back to Elland Road where he belongs. Don't give up Smudger the game needs mad characters like you!!!!!!!!"

Xmas fun

My brother has just sponsored a dog from Dogs Trust for my Christmas present, I thought oh okay that's different but then I spotted the name - SMUDGE!!! He said now I had two dogs in my life, ones a scruffy waif and stray, the other plays for Newcastle...weirdly this collie dog is also black and white....a coincidence perhaps?

So here's a little poem about my Christmas Day

Dangerous triangular diamond earrings
As sharp and bewitching as the frost out there glistening
Stationery including an address book finally get myself organised
To get to sponsor a dog called Smudge was a cool surprise
Pilgrim earrings, adopt a seal and a smoothie book
This year I didn't get any "muck"!!!
Purple beaded bracelet so pretty in the light
After the Christmas pudding I felt a little "tight"!
Sherry washed down with a dash of red wine
The AGA dinner was truly divine
Green tea to detox my Christmas
Charles Worthington hair products to make me into a bonny lass
From Burberry perfume to a fair trade bag made out of colourful bags stitched together
This could turn out to be the best Christmas period ever
Infuriated Stu on the Buzz game with my lighting quick finger
I don't linger!
Cheered and got emotional over Doctor Who
What a to do
On Strictly Come Dancing Christmas Special
How did that portly cheeky chappy win yes you Darren Gough?
People's champ but dance chump for me - poor Gethin must have been cheesed off!
Dragons Den amused me
Whilst I stuffed myself with crisps and drank Green Tea
Gordon Ramsays Kitchen Nightmares in America was heaven sent
On kicking people's arses he is hell bent!!!
A few more presents to come when I go down south
Here's hoping Smudger tomorrow finds the goal mouth
Whacks it high into the net and makes Boxing Day just champion for me
What a day that would be.....
Merry Christmas everyone I hope you had a ball
Mine wasn't bad at all!

Christmas is almost here and life is looking good

As usual I've been chattering away, clicking the keys and clucking over football, fellas, festivities, enjoying red wine, raucous laughter, "bombing" people on Buzz (what do you mean you don't know what Buzz is? it's brilliant!!) making several christmas puddings, icing the christmas cake, phewwwww I've been busy! But I've had a little time to reflect whilst watching "When Joseph met Maria" it had me all misty eyed and nostalgic, reflecting on the trials and tribulations, how far I've come and how exciting it is having another course to run in January and a feeling that the journey's only just begun..I don't know why but I've got some interesting vibes about this Christmas...Oh and the small matter of clinching two tickets to the Oldham match at Elland Road on New Years Day. Yes!!! Get in!! cannot wait.........

Here's some more funny football comments I've been ranting on about in the last few days...


Chewing the cud over the disappointing draw vs Derby...
Viduka and Smudger played well together at Leeds and showed more than a few glimpses of their potential as a long term partnership with Smudger's tenacity and Viduka's eye for goal it looked pretty alright. But oh no, the chocolate fireguard defence caused Sam to panic and put Smudger back in midfield and stifle his attacking threat. Viduka can be quite a laboured player sometimes and he needs someone with Smudge's energy and enthusiasm to chase the ball and give him a few openings. Newcastle are a complete shambles defensively and remind me of a below par Bolton/Leeds United in the dark days, plenty of players with potential, not enough faith shown by the manager to stick with a system that suits the players and entertains the crowds.

I don't think wannabe WAGS and the Xmas turkey will be the only thing roasted this Christmas.....step forward Sam Allardyce to the long walk of shame out of St James Park, at this rate!

On Al getting the captaincy against Derby....
"I know Smudger well as I had the privelige of getting to know him when he was at Leeds. He's a top bloke, well respected and liked by all sections of the game, his prickly heart on your sleeve antics on the pitch are a far cry from the selfless kindhearted guy he is off the pitch. The press make him out (particularly the tabloids) to be some deranged nutter with no talent and this is absolutely ridiculous. He's had his fair shair of knockbacks, body blows and critics, on and off the pitch its been a rollercoaster but no one deserves the captaincy more than Smudger. He loves football, he loves the fans and after the broken leg and the tragic exit from Leeds it would've been easy to think this man would be resting on his laurels and taking his money. Thank god there's teetotal, charity supporting (without fanfare) characters like Smudge left in the game to restore our faith in English football. Good on you Smudge"

Merry Christmas everyone and don't get too stuffed!! :-)

Reflections on A Rollercoaster Ride...

Christmas is almost here, I've only just got into the "mode" taking in an RSPCA Christmas dinner, Christmas meal with the Learning Disabled groups, co hosting the garage works do, mulled wine, red wine, christmas pud, more red wine more mulled wine, more christmas pud etc etc throw in a few feedback forms, typing up the last glut of work related things, rounding off the course, panicking sweating, championing my way through a heavy schedule of a new scheme of work, pre course information, new handouts, updated handouts, updated, improved, tweaked aims of sessions.......panto.......frantically posting learners certificates.......shopping in donny......wrapping presents, buying presents.....emailing..tidying up..making lists..scrapping lists...cutting out and chopping...hiding (newspaper cuttings with You Know Who stashed away this morning as if it were a piece of filthy porn...) hating (thank god I'm leaving the choir I found it a bit cringeworthy and not very ho ho more like no no just too stuffy...some choir members noses were more stuffed up than a poor unfortunate chrimbo turkey with the lurgies running rife at the concert) phewwwwwww breathe a sigh of relief, presents sorted, cards signed, learners motivated, achieved, excited, quite a few coming back next time, another course booked, have I caught the dreaded teaching bug? perhaps I'm hooked? More food to be cooked, decorations to be made, I'm a poet did you know it..........god I'm FULL of ideas, dreams, hopes, its been a CRAZY! CREATIVE! DRAMATIC! DELIGHTFUL! 2007....

Now...here's a list of the top three things that I've enjoyed in 2007 and those things I haven't quite enjoyed!!!!!!


Top Three Highlights

1. Teaching Creative Writing
2. Alan moving to Newcastle. Out of Manchester! Yes Yes Yes. Shame he's not consistently played in his best position (no I don't mean on my floor begging for mercy ahem ahem)
3. Two articles being included on the Sports Letters page of the Yorkshire Post and more articles published on Sportingo...yay!!

Top Three Lowlights

1. Alan being in Newcastle and not in my bed. Funny. Ha ha. Just not quite a ten minute walk away is it? Oh well..can't win them all...
2. The whole saga of my southern family, feeling depressed that my Auntie was getting somewhere with her life then out of the blue gets pregnant for the fifth time at 42. As you do..
3. Ending 2007 still single. Boo hiss.

Sky High

These are the comments my learners had written on a surprise Christmas card for me, which is really sweet "Georgina! You may not have nurtured a Bronte, a Hemingway or a Dylan Thomas, but you have made us all think, plan, plot and write - so we say a big "Thankyou" and hope that in '08 there will be an advanced course run by you?" and "I love coming to your writing sessions as they get me out of my hesitation to write: thank you for all your time and encouragement" and finally "thanks for a bit of inspiration!" How sweet.....what can I say. Sums it all up. I've made everyone certificates for next week with things like "For increased confidence in own writing, useful contributions to class" etc to make them feel good about what they've achieved. I'm looking forward to the last class as it'll be interesting to look back on our first pieces of work and analyse the course but then its sad to say goodbye to some people who may or may not come back next year as its another Beginners and Improvers class, but hopefully if I tweak it and accomodate more 'Improvers' so the current crop aren't put off by the title of the course, they might be persuaded. I've got genuine interest from at least four of the learners about either coming back, bringing a friend or encouraging others to join.

Finally here's a poem I wrote a few moments ago

He looks like a peroxide skunk
But one mention of him and I feel punch drunk
Its almost midnight and I'm getting uptight
I don't look a pretty sight
Working too hard
Still haven't done your Christmas card
Laminating, typing and analysing
There's no stopping
This crazy fool called Gina who everyone calls Mrs Smith
My necks stiff
Too many hours on the PC
Need to set myself free
From late night texting, google searching and procrastinating
Over Christmas cards, Creative Writing and some guy I'd like to be dating
Bring on tomorrow more work to do
Thoughts of Alan stick in my mind like UHU glue
Better get some shut eye
Dreams of peroxide boy in fancy shirt and tie
Whatever floats your boat I guess
Sometimes my head can be a right mess!!!!!

Short and Sweet

This is what I sent to football365.com just now, thought I'd amuse you with this little email:-

Hull lost last night whilst my beloved Leeds won and Newcastle drew with Arsenal tonight. Top it all off with the shock revelation that Smudger played well. Yes really. It does happen! A pretty good few days and there's a glimmer of hope of me getting tickets to see the Kaiser Chiefs at Elland Road. Get in!!!! Seriously I've been fed up of people slagging Smudger off, mocking the fact he's been played out of position and lacking a bit of pizazz to say the least as a consequence but he's back, snapping, snarling and it won't be long before he's scoring too, honest! (I can hear the whispers and muffled laughter oi oi!) Bring on the weekend

Georgina "Loving Smudger's skunk painted with custard hairstyle - so bonkers its almost brilliant"Jane Petty

My payslip for the month is due very shortly, I went to the gym yesterday and today so I'm sky high and up for anything, been working like a trojan with the Creative Writing stuff but you know what, I'm bloody loving it, even the day from hell with Jane the pain screaming shouting sulking and singlehandedly destroying all hope of constructive learning and teaching taking place for me and Rachel during an observation in the Beginner Readers class can dampen my enthusiasm. Look out world, here comes a super WAG - Wise Ambitious and Gorgeous. Stuff the latest Chloe handbag, hell I don't even want a plush apartment, who needs that when there's tickets to the Kaiser Chiefs to be had, Alan getting an eight on the Sky.com player ratings and my own money that I've worked damn hard for coming into the bank!!!!!! H.A.P.P.Y :D

The Life of a Lovely Lively Leeds Fan in Love

To sum up what I've been up to here is what I wrote to Smudger this evening
"Hey Alan how are you? I confess I didn't see any part of the match on TV as I was busy spanking my plastic and exercising my inner WAG - which I'm often too ashamed to let out but the lure of Selfridges, Harvey Nicks and Burberry was even more tempting than Tia Maria coffee poured all over a blond bloke (what am I like?!) I went to Manchester to visit my cousin who recently moved into a flat in Deansgate with her boyfriend. I'd not been to Manchester for years. Apart from the Theatre of Nightmares, its an enchanting, buzzing place, no wonder you enjoyed it. Christmas has come early for me, I selfishly only spent on myself but what the heck, must get my head down, mark the rest of my Creative Writing class's work and start recouping some dosh now eeek!!

"All joking aside, sounds like you guys were hard done by today and I'm pleased to hear you weren't pushed too much out of position - hurrah!! I'm liking the 80's Basil Brush-esque look, you're hilariously sexy, even dressed in a bin bag you'd make me melt into mush, you mad man! Don't get too disheartened, keep fighting, things will turn around as long as everyone keeps the faith. All the best Alan, don't worry be happy and take care of yourself"

Oh my god. Feel the love people...feel the lurrrrrrrve in the room!! (bleurgh!!!!!)